The World is Collapsing Around Me!

So, I woke up this morning to another dream to remember. It’s been a while since I had a dream that I remembered, but that means I have to analyse it and figure out what it means. Here goes….

Dream: Jason and I are standing some place in a town. A small white dog, a poodle maybe(?) named Sohpia was with us. It’s almost as if she were always part of my family. Meanwhile, a sandstorm of some type comes whipping towards us dumping sand and wind our way. We need to run for cover. We find ourselves running into a city and into a building maybe 7 to 10 stories high. A man is inside and invites us up to his apartment for safety. The man appears kind enough and sincere so we follow him. He takes us to his room which is about 7 flights up.

We get comfortable and relax a bit. Suddenly there was a rumble outside. Buildings within our view were tumbling to the ground and falling in to water. We didn’t have time to run out of the building, so I opening the window and told everyone to get ready to swim out when we get close enough to the water. The building then started tumbling towards the water which is racing through the streets under us, and we jumped in and began to swim furiously to the side where there was ground. Me, Jason, and the man got to safety. We ended up walking on the streets among many other people who escaped from their buildings. Sophia was not with me. I called and called for her and she finally appeared. Someone else was holding on to her. She had to squirm out of this guy’s arms and run to me. Now we are all together and just searching for a safe place to be. Read more

Oh, The Funny Things They Say!

I was watching some funny cat videos on youtube with the boys. One of the videos were talking about cats and mentioned they are a type of animal. Cameron had something to say about that.

Cameron: What?! Cats are animals?

Me: Yes! Cats are a type of animal, just like dogs and even people.

Cameron: How can a cat be an animal when they are so clumsy?

Oh, The Funny Things They Say!

Cameron was in Sunday school yesterday and the teacher was talking about Jesus being a shepherd. She explained how shepherds watch over sheep which are notoriously dumb animals that don’t think for themselves, and are very hard to train. She showed the class a picture and asked a question.

Teacher: If Jesus is the shepherd. Who is the sheep?

Cameron: My brother!


Still No Match…

I know I mentioned before how I have my embryos up for adoption. I have seen three profiles and only one was a good match for us. We accepted the first couple, but they decided to try IVF again. I’m bummed for myself, but I am happy for them and their decision. I was where they are before I finally did get pregnant with my two boys, so I completely understand why they’d want to give it another try.

The second couple we didn’t feel comfortable with as they didn’t seem very confident in the open adoption (the agency only does open adoptions) agreement. They basically explained that if any child produced from my embryos wanted to meet us at or after the age of 16 or at any time, they were not comfortable with that (which we want to be allowed to happen if the child at 16 or older wants to meet us), but they were very willing to communicate through video, pictures, and mail which would have been fine with us before age 16 (we don’t require we see anyone after age 16, but it’s important to us the family is open to the possibility if their child wants to meet in person). Also, we weren’t that comfortable with the amount of credit they gave God to their decisions and life’s journey. ….TOO much! Read more

Oh, The Funny Things They Say!

The boys were having a little discussion in the loft today about Katy Perry. I caught a funny moment.


Cameron (looking at pictures of Katy Perry online): That’s Katy Perry!

Kiefer: That’s Katy Perry? Is Katy Perry dead?

Cameron: No, she’s a girl. Katy Perry is not dead.


The conversation went on for a while. Cameron is a huge fan and wanted to explain all he knows about Katy Perry to Kiefer who seems unusually interested in this female singer (he usually only likes male singers).

Adoption Decisions

As I have posted in the past….a long time ago, I and my husband had gone through the IVF treatment in order to get the family we so desired. We got the family we wanted. We LOVE our boys!

I thought I signed a form telling the fertility center where I had the IVF done to donate them if I don’t use them within 2 years. Apparently, this was forgotten because last year (5 years after the birth of our boys), I was contacted by the fertility center asking me what I wanted to do with them or I’d have to pay for storage. There were options for me to consider.

  1. Destroy them
  2. Destroy some of them and store the rest
  3. Donate them to science
  4. Continue to store them for later use
  5. Embryo donation
  6. Embryo adoption.

I didn’t want to just destroy them. I worked too hard to get them, I’d hate to just throw them away. What a waste (to me, not meaning to put anyone else’s personal feelings down)! I also didn’t see the point in destroying some and then still having to pay for the storage or make a different decision for the rest.

I considered giving them to science. If I were to destroy them, why not at least do something good with them.

I didn’t want to store them anymore, because I know I won’t be using them again. I’m complete with the two boys I have now. My husband is also satisfied and no longer wants any more kids. Read more

Oh, The Funny Things They Say!

The other day, it was quite cold out. For the beginning of Spring, Winter sure wants to hold on a bit longer! Kiefer, who is usually comfortable in the chilly weather, was feeling a bit uncomfortable in his jacket. He decided to let me know just how he was feeling. This is why you never accept the first comment.

Kiefer: I want to kill myself!

Me: Why?

Kiefer: I hate this world!

Me: Why?

Kiefer: I don’t want to be on this Earth anymore!

Me: Why?

Kiefer: Because I’m cold!

Is this a milestone?

My gosh Kiefer is growing up! Well, he IS technically getting taller, but he has gained a bunch of firsts and impressive actions. And Cameron! WHOA! I’m getting whiplash!

Let’s start by saying, they are doing great with their skating. Rollerblading is fun and a great exercise for them. However, I will say it’s getting hard for them wince Cameron doesn’t seem to think he can skate well and Kiefer doesn’t want to change the way he already is skating which is having his skates be very far apart making is hard to keep his balance. When the teacher gets Cameron’s attention, he does it right, but as long as he doesn’t believe in himself, he reverts back to doing it incorrectly. Well, it’s a struggle, but in the long run, they do like it. I’m nervous about getting my own skates. My ankles have a hard time with the skating and I’m not convinced they will be doing this for a long time. Meanwhile, skating isn’t going to be going on after this lesson is done. I’m fine with continuing it, but after a little break. Maybe we’ll get on to gymnastics or a different sport or activity. I might let them decide on this one. We’ll see…. Read more

The day of firsts!

Today, Kiefer decided he was going to tie his own shoe laces. He was getting close, but had a hard time. He asked for my help, so I showed him the three ways I know how to tie a shoelace. He and I chose the simplest one (tying the bunny ears). I showed him 2 times, and he got it! He was so proud of himself. He showed it to his daddy and then decided to try to teach his brother, Cameron. I sat here listening to him try to teach Cameron by showing him the way I did (tying the bunny ears). Cameron was not as motivated, but he did try to understand what Kiefer was trying to teach him. He really wanted to teach Cameron himself, so he turned down any offers for me to help, which I did towards the end, but Cameron only required some bubble gum. So, that was the end of the shoelace tying attempts from Cameron, but Kiefer did continue to practice on his own. I’m so proud of him!

So, later today, we went bike riding in the park without the training wheels. It was an unusually warm day this Winter, we were definitely going to take advantage of it. Read more