I can’t believe it’s coming up! I’m really looking forward to it. The days do seem to go by really slow which is driving me crazy! You’d think work and daily naps would help the days go by faster, but it’s not making any difference.

Even thought I am worried about what I’m going to see in the ultrasound, I’m excited about it too. Lots of questions will be answered like; Are any of the transfered embryos viable? Do I have twins or am I having one baby? If I am having twins still, how healthy are they? Are the heartbeats going strong? Are they kicking? I also want to know if I’m considered high risk or can I assume this pregnancy is so far good as any healthy pregnancy? Do I have limitations if I’m having twins? How soon could I expect to be noticing a difference in my appearance…assuming I don’t gain the weight other than baby weight? How much weight should I expect to gain keeping my weight in mind when talking about this? When do I find my own OB/GYN? OOO the questions I have. I’m going to drive someone there bonkers with all the questions streaming through my head.

So with that in mind, here are my concerns currently. What about work? I’m starting to feel some morning sickness. I haven’t thrown up, but I’ve been feeling more and more nauseated each day. I am so worried that I’m goign to end up tossing my cookies at work. I may have mentioned this in my last post, but it still is a fear of mine. I work at an OB/GYN office, and I’d hate to call Ralph on the big white phone during an exam. Poor patient would probably think I puked because of the view of her privates! I also don’t want the doctor to find out I’m pregnant that way. What a rude way to find out a secret someone who’s working for you has been carrying around…literally! I could still tell him my concerns while I’m there if I start feeling sick. It’s not like he’d not understand, but I’m not sure it’s appropriate to share somethign like that at the office. My supervisor knows I’m pregnant, so I suppose I could let her know if I think it might be a problem. She is an OB nurse, so she could always advise me on the best thing to do in this situation. Well, so far it hasn’t come to that. It may never become an issue, but it’s very likely especially if I’m having twins.

I worry too much. I can’t help that. I know while at work I’m fighting through my pregnancy brain issues. I’m such a spaz now! I do feel I’m improving in general, but when handing things to the doctor during an exam, I’m not always “there”. I do really try and the doctor is very patient with me. I’m not sure how much patience he will continue to have though. He’s known to be a very patient man. I just nope that is true, because I’m going to need that patience for a while longer.

Well, I’m still looking forward to my internship these next few weeks…assuming I don’t start dropping chunks on the floor…

Mother’s day is hard only because I’d have a baby by now had I not miscarried so many times. It’s also hard because my MIL had passed away, and I think she’d have enjoyed being a part of my husband’s journey to having a family with me.

Back to my meds. I’m a pin cushion and the pricking isn’t going to stop yet. I’m now on Lupron and on Follistim. The Lupron, I think, just kind of prepares you for the Follistim. The follistim is what tells your ovaries to make multiple, mature follicles (follicles grow an egg inside each one). One thing that does happen with the Follistim, is your ovaries bloat a bit because of the multiple eggs being produced in there. A side effect from that is bloat and soreness. So far, I’m lucky enough to just feel sore with a little bloat. Some people have pain and weight gain. I’ve only been on Follistim since Saturday, so it’s still early in the treatment and I could end up one of the people in pain. The nurse practitioner told me to drink tons of water. Oh great, I’ll be spending most of my time in the bathroom peeing away instead of learning. Oh well, I can read and that’s what the teacher does… read from the book. I have a final on Wednesday so I hope I’m able to study ok.

After the follistim has done what it’s supposed to do, I’ll be injecting ovidrel soon that forces an ovulation of the multiple eggs. At that point, the doctor will be retrieving what eggs I have made and fertilizing them that day in a petri dish. He will be putting two of them back about 3 days later and progesterone injections will start up and will continue to the tenth week of my pregnancy…assuming, of course, that I get pregnant from this. Otherwise, the progesterone will stop when the results are in.

I’m seeing my IVF nurse practitioner on Wednesday to find out how many follicles I’m making. I hope it’s a good number. For someone who had no problem making eggies on her own, I’d be surprised if I don’t have a lot in there. I just hope it’s not too over crowded in there. I understand if you make a lot of eggs, you tend to feel more pain. I just don’t want this to interfere too badly with school, but family comes first. If I have to take off from school, then I will, but I shouldn’t be feeling the pain after they retrieve the eggs anyhow and that’s in about a week or so.

Already I know that this is not going to be the most comfortable feeling for me. Please, oh please, let this week go by without much of a problem. I just want to do well on my tests and get through to next term!