Open Investigation

This morning, I was in the middle of a strange dream before my alarm clock interrupted it (isn’t that what always happens?). I remembered this dream which means, it’s one to pay attention to and think about. So, here goes…

The Dream

I arrived home sometime with my husband. My house looked like a hybrid between my grandmother’s house and the original first home of mine before we had done any changes to it. Jason (husband), whose face was never seen but I knew who he was, went inside and shut the door. There was a man outside waiting for me. He’s there with his dog, a German shepherd. We were talking. Meanwhile, at some point Sparky, my dog who was a shepherd mix now passed, appeared. Her presence did not seem important, but she was there with me. The man was asking me questions. I didn’t hear any of the questions, but I know he was talking with me and I was talking back to him. Suddenly his dog peed in my yard and it started to rain a little. The rain did not bother either of us as we kept on talking. The sky got darker and the rain started to glow. The man and I looked around and noticed the rain started to give off a light, slow down, then go up towards the clouds. How strange this was! He continued to ask me questions and talk with me, but I was more focused on the rain and its unusual behavior. It was definitely raining upwards…backwards, if you may. It started to get a little windy. Then more windy. We decided to head back towards my front door which was up the stairs in front of the house, but the stairs were much different then when I first arrived at the house. There were only about two to three of them and much more like my grandmother’s house and less like my old one. Keep in mind, I lived in my grandmother’s house for five years after she moved away so it was my house at some point. Anyhoo, I looked up and right above us was a spinning formation in the clouds. A tornado was forming just over my head! It touched down right in front of my door. I was a little afraid but more concerned and just wanted to get back inside. The tornado was weak and very small as it just moved off to the side against the house. It didn’t damage anything or rip anything up. It was not violent and just more of a nuisance. As soon as it passed away from my front door, Jason let both me and the man and our dogs inside. Then the alarm clock woke me up.

Analysis

Normally, tornado dreams both frighten me and usually imply chaos coming up in my life. However, there have been the occasional tornado dream where it does not frighten me and only predicts something in my life will be or already is shaken up a bit. So, this leaves me with wondering how everything that happened fits together and how it describes something in my life. First lets discuss the man. I knew he was asking me questions, but his questions did not appear to be important in the dream. I was answering them openly and did not feel threatened by his presence even though I didn’t know him. So this part was likely something about my feelings of letting my thoughts out freely and sharing them with someone that wants to know something. So, why the dog? In my dreams in the past, dogs mean either a guide or domestication…something important to me and in a way a part of who I am. This dog on his side implied this man was a part of me somehow. It seems like what we were discussing would be important here. Maybe it more about the act of talking and sharing thoughts/feelings than it was about the subject. Having Sparky with me I think said a lot about this being my comfort zone. She was not happy, but she was not threatened…just busy. My dream did not focus on her. She only showed up during times I was even slightly uncomfortable. She’s my anchor. My safety zone in my mind. Something I may be holding on to to feel comfort. I’m not sure the dog peeing on my yard was that important, but at the same time, it was relieving itself. This man’s dog relieving himself on my yard was like a release of emotions and thoughts. I really focused on his peeing. It was significant to my dream. I don’t think I was fascinated by peeing. I didn’t even wake up needing to pee nor did I wet the bed. The fact that I didn’t feel like peeing when I woke up tells me the dog peeing was more a release of thoughts than my bladder interfering with my dream (which has happened in the past). I think after the dogs pee, there was a turn of events that took place. That’s where I start to wonder if this is my mind telling me that something will happen because of the events preceding. With the rain changing direction, so did my emotions. I was left confused, curious, uncomfortable, uncertain. We (the man and I) wanted to return back to my home to get away from the strange things going on around me. The tornado in a way blocked me from my comfort zone, but did not cause any damage. I see this as something that will is already has shaken up my life a little, but not enough for me to feel threatened…just uncomfortable. Then I can go back to my comfort zone and all is OK.

So is this about my sister in law’s visit? I want to like her. I do like her, but I feel very uncomfortable around her. She’s inquisitive which I am fine with, but then she gets drunk, and I don’t trust her. I don’t trust people that are drunk. I just don’t know when they are being sincere or if the alcohol is speaking. I did feel threatened during the last day. Me and my boys were going through some photo albums. I was mostly asking if they recognize people from my side of the family, but a few pictures showed up of Jason’s parents and one or two of Jason and I when we just met. We looked different then. There were pictures of my sister in law in there, but she was sitting right there across the room from me. It never occurred to me to ask them if they recognized her picture, because she was right there in the room. She was hanging around, drinking, but I didn’t know she was getting upset. I couldn’t tell because she was being quiet. I assumed she was just content. She left to go smoke outside, which is something I was already used to since she does that every time she visits, and she knows I don’t allow smoking in the house. She came back inside and approached me. I don’t know if she realized she still had a puff of smoke in her mouth, but she got in my face and started asking me questions. I inhaled some of that smoke directly through my mouth! The smoke was so offensive it kind of shocked me. She was obviously upset too so I tried to answer her questions instead of giving her some words about her blowing smoke in my face. I really didn’t like it. It was a serious conversation that needed the proper attention when she wasn’t drunk, and I wasn’t on the defensive due to smoke in my face, but she needed to talk then. I thought it was settled, but she was still pretty upset. She got the idea somehow that because I didn’t point out her pictures to the boys that I don’t want her life partner as their aunt like I had been asking about. She was questioning me about my feelings on her sexual preference and assuming because I didn’t point out her pictures to the boys, I was ashamed of her or something and didn’t want to tell the boys about her. Talk about a lack of self-esteem! I don’t appreciate insecurities coming out at me like that, but that’s all it was…at least that’s what I believe it to be. I have NEVER had an issue with her being a lesbian nor have I been ashamed of her because of it, and I’m not about to make it an issue for my boys. If they want to know about their aunt, then I will tell them. I don’t see why I should hide it, but if I make it an issue, they’ll think there’s something wrong with it.

Conclusion

Seeing the events unfold in my dream, I believe this is what my dream was about. The man with the dog is a stranger to me but is a part of me…hence, my sister in law (part of me) with her alcoholism (stranger). He questioned me as I answered back freely and openly. He released some of his emotions and my world got shook up…hence the backwards rain and small, non-damaging tornado. I still welcomed the man (sister in law) into my home which is me accepting her for her. I do not believe this stranger appearing as a man had anything to do with her being a lesbian. I never even saw this person’s face, but I felt a male presence so I believed this person to be a male. Could this be a sign of a future life shake-up? Sure! But, I do feel it was more my mind trying to sort out my confused and shook up feelings after she went back home.

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